gone
My man's gone! I don't know where he is, but he's not here and he's not with me. He's been doing this a lot lately. He blames me! He blames me for not trusting him and for being hurt and for questioning him. So he leaves. He leaves and calls other women and doesn't come home for hours and hours and hours and hours. Sometimes it's up to 8 hours. And I hurt! I hurt so bad! It's hurt that no one could explain and you couldn't understand unless you've been through it. I'm afraid to share my feelings with him. I'm afraid of saying the wrong thing. I'm afraid of sharing things with him. Because he'll leave. Then, I'll load my boys in the car and I'll search for him. I search for him and beg him to choose me and come back! And I still hurt! I hurt more than I EVER thought possible. I cry and cry and throw up and shake and can't control it! And when he comes back I welcome him. I am a mess! I know I need t