2013
October 20, 2013: I went to church alone again! As we left T (my oldest) told me he didn't want to go to church if his dad didn't have to go. I was so mad and discouraged. I got to church and sat with the family we always sit with. They were always amazing and so helpful when I was at church alone. They never asked about anything, they just helped and I am so grateful for them. It was High Council Sunday and it made church even more difficult. The High Councilman started talking about obedience and about the wiseman and the foolish man. As he was speaking I realized that I can't do this anymore. I couldn't be in a marriage where we were headed 2 ways. I knew right then that my marriage was almost over. October 21, 2013: I had a normal day, but had a lot of time thinking about what to do with my life. I did laundry, cooked, cleaned and took care of my kids. The boys were in bed and I was writing in my journal and N was on the computer. I could see the re